A Billy I Call Brother

I talked to Billy yesterday. I was thinking I should call him back because I got off the phone so abruptly. I so want to find a common ground with him that has nothing to do with Bill and Flo or all of that. Yet I feel afraid to do so. Though the one thing that Bill and Flo ingrained in us was that we should stand for family. These lessons were really the sick side effect of the family dynamics that kept us all keeping the family secrets. What scares me is another lesson learned from Bill and Flo. That is the lesson when we get pissed no one ever talks to each other anymore. I want that Billy and I find that common ground so we don’t have a relationship full of the twisted shit. Two friends who will stand for each other and like the company of each other. A brother and sister bonded by our past but able to live beyond it. Possibly there is some peace for both of us in that.

A sibling may be the keeper of one’s identity, the only person with the keys to one’s unfettered, more fundamental self. ~Marian Sandmaier